We are really (really) big on surprises around here, if there is a way to turn a plain old cheese and spinach sandwich into a surprise, in our house it will be done. Big surprises are our favorite but much harder to pull off; the old showing up on our families doorstep and not telling a soul we are making an across the country trip, is our favorite, it never gets old. Without ever talking about it with Chris or intentionally making it our “parenting strategy”, Chris and I have successfully turned the kids totally normal childhood into a world of surprise and wonder (insert: magical magician hand movements). In our home, we are all about making the tiniest of moments like “mom, what’s for lunch?” or “what are we going to do today?” into a surprise (jazz hands, this time).
Want to learn the art of serving up a lifetime of surprises (for your kids or just friends)? Basically just never tell anyone what you are doing, till it’s done and then sit back and look at all those smiling faces (they are so smiley, aren’t they?). Okay not literally that was actually really bad advice but I was half-joking, to be clear — but also it’s basically sorta just like that.
Look at it this way; what is the best part about doing something fun, new, exciting or different with the kids (or friends/family)? It’s pretty much a toss-up between telling them about the fun, new, exciting or different thing and actually doing it. Right? The thing we noticed and I KNOW you have too, is that when something is fun, new, exciting or different and you tell the kids (any kids) about it, it usually plays out like this:
US: “hey kids, we are getting you a bunk bed!?”
KIDS: “YAY!!!!! We can’t wait!! When!?”
KIDS: “When is the bunk bed coming?”
KIDS: “When is the bunk bed coming?”
KIDS: “When is the bunk bed coming?”
KIDS: “When is the bunk bed coming?”
KIDS: “When is the bunk bed coming?”
Let’s all nod our heads, together now. They (plus you) still get the initial “YAY!!” excitement, but then you get the tens of millions of “whens” and “are we there yets?” in between, before the final happiness moment actually arrives. How we like to live life, is to combine the telling and the moment of the fun, new, exciting and different thing into one giant (or small) surprise. So that bunk bed situation above, actually played out more like this in our home:
US: We ordered a bunk bed and didn’t tell the kids. Then bunk bed arrived and we hid it. We put the kids to bed like normal and then carried them out of their beds and into our bed (while they slept). Then while they slept, built the bunk bed and transferred them over (still while they were sleeping) into their brand new bunk bed. (it was actually Chris who did all the work, I was sicker then a dog and cheered him on from the couch)
KIDS: When they woke up in the morning “Where are we? AHHH!! Bunk Beds!! WE GOT BUNK BEDS!!!”
One giant surprise and a super exciting moment which was pretty amazing for everyone. Seriously, seeing them happy is my faaaaavorite! And there were no one million “is it here yet?” questions that maybe dull the excitement a tad, let’s be honest.
So the actual art of Living a Life of Surprises, falls more in the art of skipping the onslaught of questions but as a result everything becomes so much more magical, even the otherwise mundane. When following “The Living a Life of Surprises technique”; by default everything can easily be turned into a small version of Christmas morning, but without the advent calendar. Conversations in our house usually go a lot like this:
KIDS: “What’s for lunch?”
US: “It’s a surprise!”
KIDS: “What are we doing today?”
US: “It’s a surprise!”
Literally, everything we can possibly make into a surprise, gets the surprise, stamp. I figure we only have a few more years left of this before they are teenagers and totally annoyed by our constant surprise tactics, so we are taking FULL advantage (here’s another old example or version of this). And hey to be honest sometimes the surprise is on us, like maybe they didn’t end up liking the surprise I made them for lunch (oh it, happens) — but it’s still worth a good old surprise, try.
*both pictures are old (like a year old) — and I can see how much they have grown just by glancing, time sure flies man.
This was hilarious, because its true! I’m gonna use this tactic!
I just love your posts and writing so much